BSD 3 development

[unix-history] / usr / games / lib / fortunes

Some men are discovered; others are found out.
Straw?  No, too stupid a fad.  I put soot on warts.
Words must be weighed, not counted.
By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.
He who spends a storm beneath a tree, takes life with a grain of TNT.
You attempt things that you do not even plan because of your extreme stupidity.
Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of themselves.
Words are the voice of the heart.
Your mind understands what you have been taught; your heart, what is true.
A king's castle is his home.
He who has a shady past knows that nice guys finish last.
The universe is laughing behind your back.
The best prophet of the future is the past.
It is a poor judge who cannot award a prize.
Even the boldest zebra fears the hungry lion.
Money will say more in one moment than the most eloquent lover can in years.
Money may buy friendship but money can not buy love.
Might as well be frank, monsieur. It would take a miracle to get you out of Casablanca.
Creditors have much better memories than debtors.
Many pages make a thick book.
Every purchase has its price.
Do not underestimate the power of the Force.
You will step on the night soil of many countries.
Mind your own business, Spock. I'm sick of your halfbreed interference.
He who invents adages for others to peruse takes along rowboat when going on cruise.
Of all forms of caution, caution in love is the most fatal.
If you suspect a man, don't employ him.
The Tree of Learning bears the noblest fruit, but noble fruit tastes bad.
Stop searching forever. Happiness is unattainable.
A man who fishes for marlin in ponds will put his money in Etruscan bonds.
A good memory does not equal pale ink.
A pretty woman can do anything; an ugly woman must do everything.
How sharper than a hound's tooth it is to have a thankless serpent.
You dialed 2290
It's later than you think.
Mistakes are oft the stepping stones to failure.
It's not reality that's important, but how you percieve things.
Promptness is its own reward, if one lives by the clock instead of the sword.
Like winter snow on summer lawn, time past is time gone.
Far duller than a serpent's tooth it is to spend a quiet youth.
Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
The attacker must vanquish; the defender need only survive.
Standing on head makes smile of frown, but rest of face also upside down.
Deprive a mirror of its silver and even the Czar won't see his face.
Man's horizons are bounded by his vision.
To criticize the incompetent is easy; it is more difficult to criticize the competent.
He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet.
Men seldom show dimples to girls who have pimples.
Troglodytism does not necessarily imply a low cultural level.
You cannot kill time without injuring eternity.
Ettiquetee is for those with no breeding; fashion for those with no taste.
As goatherd learns his trade by goat, so writer learns his trade by wrote.
One man tells a falsehood, a hundred repeat it as true.
Crazee Edeee,  his prices are INSANE!!!
It is better to wear out than to rust out.
When the wind is great, bow before it; when the wind is heavy, yield to it.
The wise shepherd never trusts his flock to a smiling wolf.
It is the wise bird who builds his nest in a tree.
How you look depends on where you go.
A plucked goose doesn't lay golden eggs.
A man who turns green has eschewed protein.
Put not your trust in money, but put your money in trust.
Even a hawk is an eagle among crows.
When among apes, one must play the ape.
Even the smallest candle burns brighter in the dark.
People who take cat naps don't usually sleep in a cat's cradle.
A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a Unicorn.
Do not clog intellect's sluices with bits of knowledge of questionable uses.
Let him who takes the Plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.
Try to divide your time evenly to keep others happy.
You have mail.
His heart was yours from the first moment that you met.
Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle which fits them all.
Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.
With clothes the new are best, with friends the old are best.
He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another's mishap.
Beware of a dark-haired man with a loud tie.
Today is the last day of your life so far.
Flee at once, all is discovered.
Man who falls in vat of molten optical glass makes spectacle of self.
Go directly to jail.  Do not pass Go, do not collect $200.
For a good time, call 8367-3100.
Those who can, do; those who can't, simulate.
God does not play dice.
This fortune is inoperative.  Please try another.
Laugh, and the world ignores you.  Crying doesn't help either.
No amount of genius can overcome a preoccupation with detail.
You will feel hungry again in another hour.
You now have Asian Flu.
God made the integers; all else is the work of Man.
Disk crisis, please clean up!
You auto buy now.
Many are called, few are chosen.  Fewer still get to do the choosing.
Try the Moo Shu Pork.  It is especially good today.
Many are cold, but few are frozen.
The early worm gets the bird.
He who hesitates is sometimes saved.
Time is nature's way of making sure that everything doesn't happen at once.
The future isn't what it used to be. (It never was.)
Can't open /usr/games/lib/fortunes.
If God had wanted you to go around nude, He would have given you bigger hands.
It is better to have loved and lost than just to have lost.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance from Charlie.
Disk crunch - please clean up.
Center meeting at 4pm in 2C-543
I will never lie to you.
Spock: We suffered 23 casualties in that attack, Captain.
Your computer account is overdrawn.  Please reauthorize.
1 bulls, 3 cows
It's hard to get ivory in Africa, but in Alabama the Tuscaloosa.
Waste not, get your budget cut next year.
Old MacDonald had an agricultural real estate tax abatement.
Snow Day - stay home.
Save gas, don't eat beans.
All that glitters has a high refractive index.
Ignore previous fortune.
When in doubt, lead trump.
23. ...  r-q1
unix soit qui mal y pense
Even a cabbage may look at a king.
Honi soit la vache qui rit.
No directory
Don't eat yellow snow.
One Bell System - it works.
One Bell System - it sometimes works.
* UNIX is a Trademark of Bell Laboratories.
chess tonight
External Security:
Tom's hungry, time to eat lunch.
Phone call for chucky-pooh.
MOUNT TAPE U1439 ON B3, NO RING
A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
IOT trap -- core dumped
IOT trap -- mos dumped
/usr/news/gotcha
Rotten wood can not be carved - Confucius (Analects, Book 5, Ch. 9)
System going down at 1:45 this afternoon for disk crashing.
: is not an identifier
Quantity is no substitute for quality, but its the only one we've got.
Those who can do, those who can't, write.
The more things change, the more they'll never be the same again.
You've been Berkeley'ed.
Excessive login messages is a sure sign of senility.
Say logout to logout.
fortune: not found
System going down at 5 this afternoon to install scheduler bug.
Can anything be sadder than work left unfinished?  Yes, work never begun.
There is no heavier burden than a great potential.
Change your thoughts and you change your world.
It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them.
A man paints with his brains and not with his hands.
Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist.
He who lives without folly is less wise than he believes.
Failure is more frequently from want of energy than want of capital.
Success is a journey, not a destination.
Men love to wonder, and that is the seed of science.
Two men look out through the same bars; one sees mud, and one the stars.
The man who makes no mistakes does not usually make anything.
Youth is the trustee of posterity.
Time is but the stream I go a-fishing in.
The greatest of faults is to be conscious of none.
He that would govern others, first should be the master of himself.
Above all things, reverence yourself.
Learned men are the cisterns of knowledge, not the fountainheads.
The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears.
It is better to die on your feet than to live on your knees.
Courage is grace under pressure.
Culture is the habit of being pleased with the best and knowing why.
Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.
He who hates vices hates mankind.
To teach is to learn.
Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.
Nothing in life is to be feared.  It is only to be understood.
There is no such thing as pure pleasure; some anxiety always goes with it.
God must love the common man; He made so many of them.
Integrity has no need for rules.
The price of greatness is responsibility.
The important thing is not to stop questioning.
A clash of doctrine is not a disaster - it is an opportunity.
The end of labor is to gain leisure.
Your education begins where what is called your education is over.
Can anyone remember when the times were not hard, and money not scarce?
All great ideas are controversial, or have been at one time.
The finest eloquence is that which gets things done.
The life which is unexamined is not worth living.
Happiness adds and multiplies as we divide it with others.